A hole in the clouds

My day began with tossing and turning…in my bed …at 3am.  No matter how many times I closed my eyes – those few additional hours of sleep were not meant to be.  So by 4 I gave up.  I crawled out of bed, tiptoed into the kitchen and poured my first cup of coffee.

Part of me anticipated something big, thinking, God would only awaken me if He had something important to reveal, right?  So, with coffee in hand, I grabbed my bible and journal, and settled in my comfy chair for some treasured solitude with God.

Although I just returned from a relaxing family vacation, the anxiety I’d been nursing remained and lying lakeside provided but a brief reprieve from the stress worry brings.  Lets face it – these are trying times.  Our personal worlds are filled with unique situations that bring fear on varied fronts.  Yet the question for me remains, why this ongoing struggle of worry & fear within my heart when my head is aware of God’s promises?

Some would respond to my question with, “you should spend more time in prayer” or  “you should memorize scriptures to battle your fears”.  While true (and I completely agree!), right now for me that is easier said than done.  Yet, perhaps this was the reason behind my early morning anticipation – the hope of God speaking a word of reassurance directly into the cares of my life.

Of course…..He did.

I ashamedly admit taking a sneak peak at my laptop before my Bible.  My reasoning was to check the precise time for sunrise.  Surely seeing the sun come over the horizon would remind me of God’s greatness and assure me of His power.  So at 6am, I ventured outside -- along with my third helping of morning java -- pointed my face east and waited.   As morning dawned, rather than being greeted by the golden hues of a rising sun, my eyes met puffy grey clouds, moving quickly across the sky. 

Ok God….what’s the purpose in this? 

Where’s the sun?

The rolling, grey clouds changed shape and shade as the gentle breeze moved them onward.  Long, taffy-like stretches of darkness were mixed with milky grey as the sun rose behind the cloud front.  I thought about how much the clouds resembled my cares – some appearing heavier and moving along more slowly than others. 

Then I saw it – a hole in the clouds.  It gradually began to grow in size and brightness. 

Just like life…. those rolling clouds and shades of gray resemble my trials and trouble.  As my heart looks upward toward God, I can choose to focus on His power and promises.  Then, amidst the clouds of fear and worry, a glimpse of sunshine and light appears.

As I finish this writing – the skies have darkened yet again.  But I’m learning that that God’s light is waiting behind the clouds.  The hope I have as His beloved daughter never really darkens.  It may be shaded by the clouds of worry and fear, but I can know that the light of God’s promises remain strong and true. 

Find rest, O my soul, in God alone; my hope comes from him.  He alone is my rock and my salvation; he is my fortress, I will not be shaken.  Psalm 62:5&6 NIV

Trust God from the bottom of your heart; don't try to figure out everything on your own.  Listen for God's voice in everything you do, everywhere you go; he's the one who will keep you on track.  Proverbs 3:5&6 The Message

Since God assured us, "I'll never let you down, never walk off and leave you," we can boldly quote, “God is there, ready to help; I'm fearless no matter what. Who or what can get to me?” Hebrews 13:6 The Message

One Gutsy Gal

Someone recently commented that I was a nice person – a very nice compliment (no pun intended).  Please don’t misunderstand; I appreciate an accolade now and then -- yet sometimes I tire of my niceness. 

My being nice doesn’t make a dramatic difference in the world.  Nor is it risky or daring.  Sometimes being nice means I don’t get my way.  Hmmmm, doesn’t sound very exciting, does it?

 

I used to think being nice was foundational to living out my faith.  Boy was I wrong (& completely misinformed)!  Jesus wasn't always nice.  Last time I checked, He even had a few enemies. 

In her book Nice Girls Don’t Change the World, Lynn Hybels states that the opposite of being a nice girl is a “good woman”. 

A good woman means trading the safe, passive, people-pleasing behavior of niceness for the dynamic power of true goodness.  It means moving from the weakness and immaturity of girlhood toward the strength and maturity of womanhood.  (pg 21)

Among other things - she goes on to say that a good woman doesn’t let fear stop her and that a “good woman can be, in reality, a dangerous woman – a woman who shows up with everything she is and joins the battle against whatever opposes the redeeming work of God in our lives and in our world.“(pg 89)

Tucked away in chapters 4 – 6 of the Biblical book of Judges is a brief story of a very dangerous woman who rose above her circumstances and became a hero.  Although most of us have never seen her story played out on a Sunday School felt board, it is one worth telling. 

Jael lived several thousand years ago -- hundreds of years before Jesus walked the earth.  Most likely she was a very well behaved wife, housekeeper, mother and friend.  Although she was an Israelite, her husband had uprooted his family from their close-knit tribal community and re-settled amongst the neighboring Canaanites.  We are told that her husband formed a friendly alliance with the Canaanite King Jabin. 

At this time in history, the Israelites and Canaanites were hostile neighbors -- the Canaanites having the upper hand.  Sisera, a ruthless and cruel Canaanite army commander was making life miserable for the Israelites – a misery that continued for decades.

Weary from the severe Canaanite oppression, the Israelites cried out to God for help.  We’re told that God told the Israelite army to advance & attack the Canaanites, promising a victory.  So, the poorly armed Israelites marched into battle against Sisera’s superior military force. 

As the battle between the two armies ensued, God sent a violent storm to confuse the Canaanite warriors.  They charged into a valley, where they died by the swords of the Israelites.  Not a single Canaanite warrior survived.  However, their commander Sisera, managed to escape on foot.

“Meanwhile, Sisera ran to the tent of Jael, the wife of Heber the Kenite, because Heber’s family was on friendly terms with King Jabin of Hazor.  Jael went out to meet Sisera and said to him, “come into my tent, sir.  Come in. Don’t be afraid.”  So he went into her tent, and she covered him with a blanket.

“Please give me some water, “ he said.  “I’m thirsty.”  So she gave him some milk from a leather bag and covered him again.

“Stand at the door of the tent” he told her.  “If anybody comes and asks you if there is anyone here, say no.”

But when Sisera fell asleep from exhaustion, Jael quietly crept up to him with a hammer and tent peg in her hand.  Then she drove the tent peg through his temple and into the ground and so he died. 

Judges 4:17 – 21 NLT

Wowzers!  Gotta give Jael credit for her bravery and quick thinking prowess.  She is quite the gutsy gal. 

So gutsy in fact that she became a legend amongst her people.  Judges chapter 6 includes a song with a portion written in her honor:

“Most blessed among women is Jael, the wife of Heber the Kenite.  May she be blessed above all women who live in tents.

Sisera asked for water, and she gave him milk.  In a bowl fit for nobles, she brought him yogurt.

Then with her left hand she reached for a tent peg, and with her right hand for the workman’s hammer.

She struck Sisera with the hammer, crushing his head.

With a shattering blow, she pierced his temples.

He sank, he fell, he lay still at her feet.

And where he sank, there he died.”            Judges 5:24-27

So, what have I learned from this dangerous woman?

•     Like Jael, I can choose to see purpose in my circumstances – and believe that God has positioned me for a perfect opportunity to serve Him no matter how alone, overwhelmed or afraid I may feel.  It was Jael’s circumstances that strategically positioned her for the opportunity to become a hero to her people.

•     Like Jael, I can choose not to allow my status to limit me. Isn’t it just like God to chose someone weak to vanquish someone strong?  Although I may feel inadequate, unprepared and insignificant, God can make a way for me to emerge victorious over any challenge.  Sisera was a wicked military leader with thousands of warriors at his disposal, yet he was no match for God’s warrior, Jael. 

•     Like Jael, I can take action – no matter how risky or out-of-the-box it may seem.  When Jael saw the opportunity, rather than wait for someone else to come along, she steadied her hand, raised her hammer and struck.  

How about you?  Do you find yourself living amidst complicated circumstances?  Perhaps you are far from home or living amongst the unfamiliar.  Or - you may feel alone, inadequate or weak.  May Jael's story give you a different perspective with which to view your world AND give you hope for the future.

Lynn Hybel wrote this poem and included in her book.  It inspires me and I pray that it may inspire you to live "dangerously" too!

May we be dangerous women.

May we be women who acknowledge our power to change, and grow, and be radically alive for God.

May we be healers of wounds and righters of wrongs.

May we weep with those who weep and speak for those who cannot speak for themselves.

May we cherish children, embrace the elderly, and empower the poor.

May we pray deeply and teach wisely.

May we be srong and gentle leaders.

May we sing songs of joy and talk down fear.

May we never hesitate to let passion push us, conviction compel us, and righteous anger energize.

May we strike fear into all that is unjust and evil in the world.

May we dismantle abusive systems and silence lies with truth.

May we shine like stars in a darkened generation. 

May we overflow with goodness in the name of God and by the power of Jesus. 

And in that name, and by that power, may we change the world.

Dear God, Please make us dangerous women.

Amen.